Live, Laugh, Love: The Dead
by AnimeSiren
Summary: This is a Drabble Collection with a very large and widespread selection of pairings, themes, and relevant factual content. Drabble 24: Nemu contemplates the nature around her, her existence, and makes a realization.
1. ShunsuiXNanao

**Yay, bleach drabble!**

**X-X-X**

Now the seireitei captains had witnessed many things in their lifetimes, especially during their captains meetings.

But this was certainly a first.

This may even top the time that the captains entered to find half undressed eighth and thirteenth squad captains passed out on each other.

This was certainly the cream of the crop.

It was during the monthly lieutenant and captain meeting, a meeting where all the captains and the entirety of the lieutenants from all the squads would convene in one large meeting room and discus all the issues the squads faced.

Well this was the meeting that was going to be remembered for eternity.

The meeting had already begun when Kyouraku-taichou walked in late, but the odd thing was his lieutenant wasn't already there, also he was wearing his regular Shinigami robes with no frilly over kimono.

Jaws dropped at what happened next.

His lieutenant came in very calmly and sat down in her seat.

Wearing the pink robe.

Without her books or notes.

With her hair down messily.

It took just about five seconds for everyone to comprehend the implication to both their disheveled appearances and their attire.

Chins hit the floor.

Nanao coughed slightly and readjusted her glasses.

**X-X-X**

**Cool this took me about two minutes to write, the idea just hit me.**

**Hope you enjoyed.**

**-AnimeSiren**


	2. Rukia, Ichigo, Byakuya & Renji

**The fact that I don't do drugs is the only thing that keeps me from thinking I was high when I wrote this.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.**

**X-X-X**

Each of their relationships was different. They all happened in different ways and each meant something else to each person.

When Ichigo took Rukia it was with built up tension and each part was hurried but sweet. They loved.

When Renji took Ichigo it was drunk and sloppy. They barely remembered the tangled limbs and sloppy pattern. They blushed the next day, nothing more.

When Rukia took is was surprising and uncomfortable. There was heat and dry kisses as they melted each other into the park ground.

Then when Renji took Byakuya there was a quiet refusal to let go, this was gold and it was good.

Each pairing has its own symbolism.

Ichigo left with Rukia memories and a lifetime,

The bruising and scratches, not to mention bite marks, on Ichigo and Renji symbolizes their comfort to one another, able to let out their animal instincts.

Renji left warmth with Byakuya like he had never felt before, then they learned love.

They all hated, loved, and fucked each other.

They are each other.

**X-X-X**

**I hope you liked it, please review!**

**-AnimeSiren**


	3. Ukitake's dirty little secret!

**Disclaimer: I don't own.**

**X-X-X**

Captain Jyuushiro Ukitake has a dirty little secret. A perverted one actually.

He had written down every time he and Shunsui have had sex, usually with details.

But his favorite time was their fourth time third year in the academy.

There was just something appealing about having Yamamoto-sensei catch them trying to have sex on the amphitheatre ceiling.

**X-X-X**

**Hope you enjoyed.**

**-AnimeSiren**


	4. Rukia, Lollypops, period

**Can't you just imagine this one?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own!**

**X-X-X**

There was one thing that Rukia absolutely loved from the living world. She loved the strawberry flavored lollypops from a corner store down the street from Ichigo's.

Isshin sometimes got them to put in the clinic for the kids that came in.

And Ichigo loved going out at any time to get them for her.

As long as she didn't eat them in public.

He wanted to keep that little delight to himself.

That and he was pretty sure that if Keigo saw he would die from blood loss.

**X-X-X**

**Hope you enjoyed!**

**-AnimeSiren**


	5. Death's a different deal to all

**Hey again!**

**I hope you read and review! Not to mention enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I seriously don't own…**

**X-X-X**

Death means something different to each person you ask, especially when you ask a Shinigami.

If you were to ask Kuchiki Rukia what it meant to die, she'd tell you it was a rule and regulation.

If you asked Kurosaki Ichigo he'll tell you it's nothing more than a roadblock. A short stop that is totally unnecessary.

If you asked Kyouraku Shunsui what it was like to die held tell you with a quite unnecessary grin, that it was like the look in a women's eye when you had to refuse her. Quite sad really, he'd add.

Then again if you asked both Ukitake Jyuushiro and Unohana Retsu what it meant to die, they'd both say something akin to this: Death is rebirth, it's the ability to stave life away and embrace purification.

Then again you might not get an answer if you were to ask Yamamoto Genryuusai or Zaraki Kenpachi.

For Kenpachi would more than likely snort at you and walk away. And Yamamoto-sensei would simply look at you a for a moment then say that that was a long, long time ago.

So you see it is very different no matter who you ask, if you can even get an answer.

**X-X-X**

**I hope you liked it, my drabbles are a little if-y right now so I hope you did enjoy.**

**Please review and tell me what you think!**

**-AnimeSiren**


	6. Unohana's Mortal Sin

**Now this is one of my drabbles that I especially like a lot! So I really hope you like it too!**

**Disclaimer: Bleach isn't mine…**

**X-X-X**

Many tell Captain Unohana that her hair would better suit her flowing elegantly down her back rather that plaited down her front.

She smiles at them and nods; sometimes she'll say quietly "Maybe it is so," but other than that she has no response for that comment.

She also has no response for something else that is well asked.

Many people in death want to know how another person died, indeed every well liquored party Shunsui loves regaling people with the tale of dying in the arms of a big breasted blond. (He always claimed he was sexed to death!)

Retsu never told people how she died.

Nobody figured the two things were connected.

Many people didn't retain the scars they obtained in life.

However she did, and some others did, usually the scars others bore were on their wrists.

Because if you committed what in the living world Catholic priests called "A Mortal Sin," you retained the marks from it.

Unohana Retsu wore her hair plaited down her neck because in 1812 she stood during the battle of Sagets Harbor and slit her own throat.

So why did she wear her hair plaited down her front?

To hide her shame.

To hide what was called her mortal sin.

**X-X-X**

**I really hop you enjoyed this one, I like because it's just so…corny? Maybe that's the term to describe it.**

**-AnimeSiren**


	7. Ichigo's Hellish Day

**It's probably not very good, but every author has to have a crack fic right? Even if it is only a drabble.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own bleach or any of its affiliates…blah…blah…blah.**

**X-X-X**

The Hellish Day of Ichigo Kurosaki 

Saturday

6:00 AM

Ichigo was woken rudely by Isshin Kurosaki, and was told they were to have a family meeting.

6:01 AM

Ichigo goes back to sleep.

6:03 AM

Ichigo is awoken once more by a flying kick, which is readily evaded.

6:05 AM

Ichigo walks into his quiet living room where his sisters are seated, leaning up against one another, half asleep.

6:06 AM

Isshin shows up with the subject of the meeting, who was a tall man about the same age as Isshin, with white hair and square glasses.

6:07 AM

Isshin makes announcement: "This is your new mother!"

6:07:14 AM

Ichigo falls over.

6:08 AM

Ichigo stands up as a blue haired youth walks into the room…And Isshin makes a second announcement: "And this is your brother!"

6:08:07 AM

"Uryuu!"

6:08:14 AM

"Kurosaki!"

6:08:21 AM

"You!" "You!"

6:08:59 AM

"Ah! I see you two know each other!" Ichigo feints…

6:10 AM

"Well, shall we go out to an early breakfast?" asked Isshin.

"I suppose," replied Ryuuken.

The first ten minutes of Ichigo Kurosaki's Hellish Day 

**X-X-X**

Come on, you know you want to review! 


	8. Ichigo's Photo's Part 1

Ichigo was having a really good day, the key word being was. For when he went to the film studio to pick up his developed pictures it all changed.

He had walked in thinking it was going to be a good day, he had even been half-smiling. And there were no Shinigami duties that day, and the sun was even shining!

Life was momentarily good.

However when he picked up the packet of photos (Which were all of his Soul Society friends) the cheeky clerk had to say something.

"Practicing for Halloween or something?" he said, grinning smugly at Ichigo.

"Or something," grumbled out Ichigo as he paid the kid and snatched the photos out of his hand.

And it rained outside.

X-X-X

Do you like? 


	9. Rukia Fluff

It was assumed by Rukia that when she regained her Shinigami powers she was going to defeat Hollows by herself once in a while. After all, she figured she couldn't defeat all the hollows, Ichigo might get rusty

However Ichigo put up quite the fight on that subject, he told her that she wasn't strong enough to fight Hollows on her own.

Well, once she gave him the cold shoulder he changed his tune.

But still, he'd follow after her whenever he could, staying in the shadows, watching her.

Rukia knew he was there but she stopped herself from being mad by remembering that he just wanted to protect her.

She could live with that.

X-X-X

Aww…Isn't it cute? 


	10. Kurosaki Family Love

It was true that there were many different types of love in the Kurosaki household.

Different senses, different levels of awareness.

The love Isshin shared with his two daughters was a kind of desperate smother. He loved them, acted fruity around them, and provided for them as much as he could.

They growled, grumbled, and reprimanded him; however it was always with love and compassion.

Isshin had a different kind of love with Ichigo. His mother filled the point in his life where he needed to be smothered. And since Masaki had died Isshin had only been able to get away with loving his son by taking pride in him.

He knew his son was a good man, and he loved him.

Ichigo had a different kind of love with his sisters, most of the time he treated them as babies or brats. And he argued and struggled with them, or at least he did with Karin. But he loved them and them he.

They showed it in the way Ichigo picked them up from school every Friday, even if that meant he had to cut class to do it.

They showed it in the way that Ichigo, Karin, and Isshin would secretly smile after a brawl with one or the other.

And they showed it in the way Yuzu would tenderly hand out a bowl of food.

There were many different types of love in the Kurosaki household, but they loved all the same. And they loved with a passion that few families, even ones that had all of its members, could rival.

X-X-X

Sappy, isn't it? 


	11. Ichigo's Photos Part 2

**Continuation of Drabble 7**

Rukia looked up as the rain started to pour outside, wondering where the sun had disappeared off to. And then she went back to reading her Manga as Ichigo crashed through the door, slamming it in his wake.

"Ichigo?" said Rukia, looking up at him from the floor.

"What?!" he snarled as he threw a small packet onto his bed.

"Never mind," grumbled Rukia back.

However for the next several minutes she kept hearing strange things coming from the angsty corner where Ichigo now resided.

"Stupid kid, show him who's smug…"

"Halloween, Hah! Maybe he'd like to see a real hollow…"

"…Moron."

Rukia simply continued to 'study' the modern society, not bothering with Ichigo.

'_After all_,' she thought. '_He's bound to be weird, he's human._'

X-X-X

**Did you like the continuation? I thought of it when I was typing up the first part.**

**REVIEW!!!!! (Please????)**


	12. Pop Quiz!

In retrospect Ichigo supposed he should have told Rukia that there was no talking during a pop quiz, but it was too funny.

Their teacher had decided to give them a pop quiz, and not a minute later Rukia asked, in a normal pushy voice:

"Hey! Ichigo! What's number one?"

Their teacher then exclaimed (in a disgruntled and rather pompous tone) "Miss Kuchiki! There is no cheating on a test!"

Ichigo had to laugh at this, so he did.

"Mr. Kurosaki, be quiet at once!"

He didn't.

"That's it, Kurosaki, Kuchiki, Detention!"

Ichigo had needed a laugh so he was rather O.K. with it, and he only felt a little bad for the teacher.

However when Rukia found out what detention was she was pissed…

X-X-X

…**I could just see it!**


	13. Isshin Knows

**I'm back in business I got my software back and I got the ideas rolling!**

**I hope you enjoy this, my first one back on after a two-month absence!**

**X-X-X**

"Kurosaki residence, Yuzu speaking," said Yuzu as she answered the phone.

"Is Isshin Kurosaki available?" asked the voice of the overly polite lady at the other end.

"No he's not. Can I take a message please?" Yuzu asked trying to be as polite as possible incase this women was calling in business related to the clinic. Her father was currently caught up in the clinic; an ambulance had arrived a short while ago bearing a woman in labor.

"Yes. Kurosaki Ichigo left his morning classes and was not seen for the rest of the day. This is the second time this week and with his attendance record we implore you to speak with him," the women on the other end seemed all of a sudden very disgruntled by the news she bore.

Obviously this was not the first time she had called the household bearing this same message.

Late that night Yuzu was finally able to nab a chance to talk to her father.

"How did the birth go, chichiue?" she asked tentatively as her father sat to rest in the kitchen while she made dinner.

"Oh fine, fine. She was successfully transferred to Kurakura General," he replied leaning back in his chair and stretching his arms tiredly.

"Mhhh," said Yuzu as she stirred a pot. "Ichigo's school today, otou-san, they said he skipped out today, and that it's not the first time. They want you to talk to him, otou-san."

Isshin looked a Yuzu a moment before responding, apparently choosing his words wisely. "Nah, he's O.K." he finally said, picking up his mug of coffee and taking a sip.

"But-?" Yuzu started, turning away from the stove.

"He's got his responsibilities, he's O.K. The schools going to have to deal with it if they're choosing to meddle with it this much."

Yuzu fell silent, wondering if she'd ever discover just what was going on with her family.

X-X-X

Karin was outside the door, and she heard everything.

She knew what Ichigo was doing, she had told him so.

But now she knew she wasn't the only one, her dad knew too.

**X-X-X**

**I think I did this just for the ending scene really.**


	14. Kisuke's blame

"Just let me!" cried Isshin, smacking his hand on the floor of the twelfth division dojo.

Urahara studied him again, just for a moment. He knew he meant it; he'd take the blame, every bit of it. The Kurosaki that sat in front of him was desperate. He needed to do something; he needed to feel something, to have something to cling to, be it good or bad.

"I will not."

"Kisuke!"

"No! Isshin! You are thinking with madness. Even if the punishment isn't death it will be exile. I'm certain that its exile, by noon tomorrow I doubt I will be in Seireitei any longer be it by exile or death," Urahara said this forcefully. "It is my crime and I will except the punishment."

"But if you are certain that it is going to be exile why not let me take the blame?" Isshin pressed.

"Why are you so anxious to do this?" asked Urahara a suspicious peer alighting his face.

Isshin didn't immediately answer, he just continued on. "You are a genius, a master of technology, hell you're the founder of the bureau. And you have Yoruichi…you have a life here."

"And _you_ don't?"

Isshin didn't respond, however Kisuke had one more thing to say before he quieted.

"I may have a life here, as fragmented as it is, but _I will_ except the punishment for my greatest achievement. You say you have nothing, but you do. I know in fact what is it you truly seek and I am most certain that someday you will find it."

Isshin could only weep.

**X-X-X**

**I could most definitely see this.**

**I hope you enjoyed it and please review and tell me what you think.**


	15. IchiXRuki

"Ichigo?" asked a curious voice.

"Yeah?" came the muffled voice of the sought after youth.

"What are you doing?" asked Rukia, the site before her was odd; Ichigo seemed to be wrestling with his pillow for no apparent reason.

"Trying to suffocate myself," replied Ichigo, who dared enough to peer one eyed over the pillow at Rukia.

"Why?" asked Rukia.

"You should wear clothes your own size," Ichigo replied instead.

"Why? I like your sisters clothes?" Rukia couldn't see what was wrong with them.

"Yeah, there only SIX YEARS TOO LITTLE FOR YOU!" he shrieked.

"Is that all" asked Rukia, her eye twitching.

"Yeah," sighed Ichigo collapsing into his pillow. "Glad we could clear that up."

**X-X-X**

**I could totally see it…**


	16. Ichigo's Dad Sleepwalks

"Hey Ichigo?" asking Rukia, breaking the previous calm quiet of the room.

"What?" asked Ichigo looking up from the schoolbook he was studying at his desk.

"Do you know that your dad sleep walks?" replied Rukia.

"No," said Ichigo shortly, but a flash of curiosity shot through his annoyed face. "Why?"

Rukia ignored his question but when Ichigo went back to his schoolwork a few minutes later she continued her questioning.

"Do you know your dad sleeps naked?"

"No!" exclaimed Ichigo staring at Rukia "Why!"

"No reason," replied Rukia looking thoughtfully back down at her manga. "Glad we cleared that up."

"WHY?"

**X-X-X**

**He he he…**


	17. Pop Quiz! II

O.K. folks I realize I promised a continuation of the Detention one didn't I. I have so much material ready to be put up but I just can't get around to putting it up. sigh bear with me please.

**X-X-X**

"Why didn't you tell me we couldn't talk?" whined Rukia, setting down the bucket of mop water sloshing it all over the floor.

"I figured you guys had tests or something in the Shinigami Academy. It's your own fault you couldn't keep your big trap shut," Ichigo said back, not at all amused, as he lifted the last chair onto it's respective guest.

"Shut it! Idiot," Rukia continued to mumble as she kneeled to begin cleaning the floor.

Ichigo spoke up a few minutes later…

"Do you know how to clean a floor?"

Rukia huffed looking over her shoulder at him "Of course I do! We had to clean in the academy for detention too."

"Well…why do you knee all the way over and scrub like that?"

"AH! Can't you be quiet, it's your fault I'm here in the first place!" Rukia sat up and turned around from her previous position. She had been laying flat on the wet floor to reach a difficult spot underneath the teacher's desk.

Ichigo stared, stunned, for just a little itty-bitty minute 'Why did she have to do the floor with cold water?' he thought to himself.

"Your right," he choked out. Of course in this situation he _had _to be the gentlemen. "Why don't you go home. You can uh…change your shirt. It's wet."

"Really!" Rukia jumped up, overly relieved to be able to go away from this mundane task "You're the best Ichigo!"

Ichigo sighed, _again_, as he watched Rukia sprint out the door, cackling to her self.

**X-X-X**

**Well there's the continuation! The first part was chapter...checks…twelve.**

**Review and tell me what you thought!**


	18. What a kiss means

A kiss on the stomach is… 

The way Ichigo can gently caress Rukia's body before they make love. Caring and gentle their bodies communicate, their eyes lock.

A kiss on the forehead is… 

The way that even on the battlefield or in the Presence of Byakuya Ichigo can shout at the top of his lungs the pledge that matters the most. He can shout that she will forever be his, and he can mean every word of it.

A kiss on the ear is… 

The playful way Ichigo twirls Rukia's hair, and the serious look in his eyes when his hands begin to roam her body. The way he can murmur how much he needs her, now and forever.

A kiss on the cheek is… 

Is the way Rukia kisses him before the lieutenants meeting starts. Letting him know their friends even though they are far deeper than that.

A kiss on the hand is… 

The way Ichigo playfully pledges his adoration for her when he tugs her hand up so that he may dance with her.

A kiss on the neck is… 

The way Ichigo sneaks up behind her in the Kuchiki compound gardens. The perfect way their forms fit each other, like a puzzle how they meld against each other.

A kiss on the shoulder is… 

The way their breathing turns ragged and fire lights their veins. It's the way their heartbeats fit together and the way their limbs tangle together frenzied like.

A kiss on the lips is… 

Is the way that on their wedding day he murmurs: "I love you" before the priest pronounces them bound together for all eternity.

**X-X-X**

**There's a different Naruto version of this with more detail in my other drabble collection.**

**I hope you enjoyed….I think I'm going sappy.**


	19. Kurotsuchi's skin

When Kurotsuchi washed he could almost see his human memories fade with the white into the water

When Kurotsuchi washed he could almost see his human memories fade with the white into the water. He could almost see a human man as he stared at peach skin.

When he bathed it was almost as if he were washing away the Shinigami and beginning to warrant a new identity.

It was within clouds of steam that he could focus on what his humanity wants. Dreams and hopes were things that, to the brilliant captain, had to be locked away.

Kurotsuchi was a man, but only when he bathed.

Eventually Nemu would be there, as per his orders, to wrap a towel around him once more. With the soft cloth would come the talons to rip and shred at his soul.

He'd comb his hair again, and paste his skin again; he'd put on his captain's robes. Finally he's host an errant thought of leaving the disguise off, of heading out skin showing.

It would immediately be pushed away and he'd finish dressing.

For Captain Kurotsuchi did not have the privilege of presenting himself to the world.

He was a Captain of the Gotei 13; he'd act and hide as such.

**X-X-X**

**Let me know what you thought, I've never really thought about Kurotsuchi before.**


	20. Isshin Never Said

When Ichigo went to Soul Society, Isshin didn't say anything.

After all, it had been so long since he'd said something.

Isshin didn't say anything when his son came home late at night after school, when he'd been out helping a soul to pass on to the next step.

Isshin didn't say anything when Ichigo cam home covered in bruises with his reiatsu spiked high.

Isshin never said a single word when he got calls from the school disciplinary office, explaining away Ichigo's skipped classes.

Isshin didn't say anything the night he destroyed an arrancar, the night that he saved Kon and released his secret to those that are few.

He didn't really say anything when his son went to battle the arrancar, nor when he felt Ryuuken's power return.

He didn't say anything when his son found out who he had been in the past, and who he still was.

He didn't say anything when his son went to medical school and moved to the city.

He didn't say anything when his son stopped seeing him for months at a time.

And Isshin, he definitely didn't say anything when Ichigo reappeared in the middle of the night with a suitcase in one hand and a new born babe pressed to his chest in the other.

And he didn't say anything when he, Isshin held the babe that had bright orange hair and deep violet eyes.

Isshin didn't ask where the mother was.

But in retrospect Isshin decided that he should have, he should have said and he should have asked. He should have sought the knowledge because in retrospect—

It was too late.

**X-_X-_X**

**I hope that you enjoyed.**


	21. Dogmas of Seireitei

Rules, Honor, and Conduct

In the professional and courtly halls of Seireitei, those three dogma's were all that mattered. Following the rules to protect and serve the world of souls. Honoring the rules to maintain the souls. Conducting oneself at the level of the Seireitei court.

All three were interchangeable.

There were different ways these things were received by the members of the Seireitei.

People like Soi-Fon and Kuchiki Byakuya followed the rules to an unprecedented level of dedication.

People like Yamamoto Genryuusai and Toushiro Hitsugaya in as widely displayed a manner as was possible.

People like Unohana Retsu and Ukitake Jyuushiro conducted themselves in such a way that their only hope could be to help shape a better future for the souls of Seireitei.

However while these dogma's were upheld separately it was not with the life or mind of a Shinigami to uphold all three.

Soi-Fon damned her own honor and the honor of those around her when blindly upholding rules.

Kuchiki Byakuya conducted himself in the only self sacrificing manner he could; rules were an atonement for his lost honor.

Yamamoto Genryuusai hid behind honor and became afraid of acting on emotion or logic. He closed his eyes to all else in the world.

Hitsugaya Toushiro shunned rules that he couldn't understand and forged no tine in attempting to do so.

Unohana Retsu put aside her own honor and held to conduct every time a wounded came into her division halls.

Ukitake Jyuushiro coughed up blood and shunned the rules and the past in heedless attempts to make a better future.

Everyone looked forward to the day a hero would enter in the court and save them all from rules, honor, and conduct.

Rules, Honor, and Conduct were the mortar of Seireitei.

All three could not coexist.


	22. Inoue's Sacrifice

Inoue stocked the new packages of syringes with a steady hand, humming to herself as she did so. She smiled serenely as she continued through the task, sometimes shuffling her feet to a particular pattern of humming.

Inoue laughed at herself as she accidentally dropped a box. When she bent to pick it up she heard an echoing laugh. Inoue stepped out of the office slightly to peer out of the small, cramped space and into the rest of the clinic, the boxes of syringes still clutched in her small hands.

The clinic still looked relatively the same as it had when Ichigo took over as head physician. It had been just a few years ago, at the same time that Inoue had smiled and took on a nurse's position as well. She had been working there ever sense, along side Ichigo like she enjoyed.

Her eyes found the source of the echoed laugh, and she smiled tightly. Rukia-san had come down into the clinic from the house. That too was a change that had occurred a few years ago.

Rukia had requested a permanent position in Karakura Town, and she had received it too. Everyone, in Soul Society and on Earth, understood that it wasn't simply or entirely a position that was requested but it was also a request for leave Many people were happy about the move, they were happy that Rukia was happy.

A few months later Kuchiki-san became Kurosaki-san.

When Inoue heard the news she had been shocked into silence, utterly lost. She knew she shouldn't be surprised at the news but she couldn't help the feeling of suddenness from coming up on her. She had admired Ichigo for a long time, and she supposed that she had always thought he might admire her as well.

She had mastered a wide smile when she had looked back up into the expectant faces of her smiling friends. She wished them a heart felt congratulations and had excitedly made plans to celebrate with them. When they left she had retired to her bedroom and hadn't come out until the next day.

Inoue stood besides Rukia at the wedding, and cried "happy" tears with the bride. She had watched and aided as a dutiful bridesmaid, and she had receded deeper inside herself as the night had wore on.

She danced until it was proper to refuse, she smiled at everyone and she let no one see her shuddering sobs when she had stepped outside the cozy building. She was happy for her friends; happy for their happiness.

Sometimes when she had to see them together it made her feel so lost inside, and so cold. It was hard for her to smile at them and not grimace and it kept getting harder with time. Sometimes the loss was all she was able to feel.

Inoue removed herself from the main room and returned to the stock office. She tried not feeling sadness at the fact that the couple had not realized she were in the room. They were too busy with happiness. They were busy with the happiness she wanted for herself.

She returned to stocking syringes.

When Inoue was finished with the syringes she sighed and closed her eyes, and then knelt against the cool metal of the shelf. The metal bit into forehead some but she couldn't really bring herself to care too much about it.

"Come on, Inoue," she said to herself "Get going before you get yourself fired."

She leaned away from the rack and began to unpack thick boxes of gauze "You're thankful for this career," she spoke to herself again, bowing her head before she could stop herself.

It was true; she was very thankful to be a nurse in the Kurosaki Clinic. When Ichigo had offered her the job she didn't think she'd ever been happier. It was one of the many things she had to be thankful for in her life.

Inoue sighed, that thought brought many memories back, and another laugh from out in the clinic made her furrow her brow.

"If I have to be unhappy for my friends to be happy then so be it," she said aloud. She clenched her eyes shut. "I'm just thankful they're safe."

**X-_X-_X**

**This drabble is aimed at feelings that reoccur at the smallest things, feelings from Hueco Mundo.**


	23. SoiFon's Zen

It was easy to sit within her garden and not perceive the outer world around her. It was easy to sit and forger her busy routine, and to only take in the pools of fish. It was easy to forget those that needed her attention and simply contemplate the shadows of the clouds.

She was one of many responsibilities, for she was Soi-Fon, Captain of the Second Squad of the Seireitei Court.

Today was a day where peace was especially necessary. She knew the theories of _dukha_, of suffering, she even forcibly enforced them. However today was a day that she musingly rejected it all.

"If I am to suffer," she murmured "Then the world is to suffer."

She didn't usually speak within the garden, at least when she was meditating. It was easier to admit things to herself when she didn't have to speak them aloud.

She had had to train new recruits that morning, ones that definitely weren't ready to be trained. Recruits that weren't ready to see what they all eventually saw. She would lose a third of this cycle's recruits within ten years, and she forced her normal, every day self to be O.K. with that.

She knew that theory too, the theory of _samsara_. She knew how birth, death, and rebirth cycled around earth other in a flurried maneuver. She knew that Hollows, Humans, and Shinigami apparently did the same.

Soi-Fon could see how Shinigami were the essence of _samsara_. They brought death to hollows, they protected humans, and they gave a rebirth to those would who required it. Then, after a time, Shinigami themselves were lost to Death.

Her recruits, her officers, and even herself would be recycled into what was called life soon enough. Soi-Fon looked at Shinigami like Yamamoto, Ukitake, and Kyouraku and silently marveled in her own awe at the expanse of life that those individuals demonstrated.

Then, of course, she looks at her new recruits and thinks two things. The first was how lucky it was that her stoic soul missed the second death that many Shinigami experienced in their first years of service. The second was how awing it was that she could full on her knees before Death even the next day and not know it was about to occur.

She knew these things. She knew that suffering of life existed; she was not a disillusioned person. She knew that death was inevitable. In her garden she could be awed by such things, before she went back to life with a heavier fist and face.

She was Soi-Fon, Captain of the Second Squad of the Seireitei Court. She was the captain that would put suffering on her warriors so that they may knee before Death with age, wisdom, and experience revolving behind them.

**X-_X-_X**

**This is what happens when you have nothing to do in the middle of an incredibly boring Buddhism class.**


	24. Zen Nemu

The trees were in full bloom, the birds were displaying their proudest plumage, and Kurotsuchi Nemu was noticing it all with enraptured eyes. It wasn't a hard beauty to notice. Nemu had seen many Shinigami walking around simply to take in the Zen that the nature around them created.

Nemu herself was only outside, however, because her erratic creator of a father had forced her from the compound and shouted that she was to practice her 'meager' abilities outside the compound, away from him. Nemu was certain that it was only because she had bested him in only eleven moves.

However, she did what she was told, always.

Nemu did not mind being outside that day. She would certainly mind if Captain Kurotsuchi discovered that she had not practiced, but the chances of that were slim. It was rare that Nemu received the chance to be away from watchful eyes and to relax and explore her own emotions.

During a celebration that was only held once every two hundred years Nemu had discovered a piece of Nirvana within the first squad compound. While everyone had been merrily congregating Nemu had run across a private Zen Garden. The rocks and never ending patterns of sand and other craft blew her away.

Seeing it had made her feel peace, and she enjoyed every chance to embroil herself in peace that came after. Nature released peace for her.

Nemu smiled, looking up into the clouds. "Today is a nice day," she said to herself.

Just then an object drifted in front of her face, and it took her a moment to recognize that it was a butterfly. It wasn't a hell butterfly summoning her back to her life; it was a normal multicolored butterfly. Just as she identified it, it took off and fluttered away.

"The butterfly is only controlled by the wind," Nemu said before she realized what words she was speaking. She put a hand to her lips. It was not like her to speak with no reason. She felt more words begin to bubble up around in her mind. She looked over at the trees that lined her.

"The leaves respect the branch," she said "And the branch respects the tree."

She sighed and closed her eyes. The sun no longer felt warm to her skin, and the breeze no longer was cool. "If everything is impermanent," she whispered, the words nearly cutting her lips as they left her mouth "Then why am I not part of everything that is around me?"

Her peace escaped from her with this new, novel though. Her day was ruined. New emotions began to fill within her and they weren't wonderful or pleasant, they were freezing and felt of hurtful things.

"Maybe I will practice after all," she said, once again to herself, rising from the ground.

**X-_X-_X**

**Hope you enjoyed, review and let me know what you though.**


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